Therapy for Transgender, Non-Binary and Gender Expansive People

Many of the people I work with in therapy identity as transgender women, transgender men, genderqueer, gender non-binary or in some way gender-expansive. I believe that the trans and gender-expansive people who choose to enter therapy with me do so, in part, because they anticipate that my personal experiences with gender will allow me to understand them well. I identify with many parts of the the LGBTQ community, and one of the ways I identify is as a non-binary, transgender, trans-masculine person. I believe that this fact helps many of my trans and gender-expansive clients feel more at ease and allows them to speak more candidly during our therapy sessions.

Support in Therapy While Coming Out as Trans or Gender Non-Conforming

Many people search for a “gender therapist” when they are in the process of coming out, starting hormone treatment or preparing for a gender-affirming surgery. This can be an exiting time in people’s lives as they start a process they have often been thinking about for a long time. Having made decisions, many people find that they are suddenly impatient to get started as soon as possible.

Simultaneously, the decision to come out or to start gender-affirming treatments can also awaken fears about social acceptance and interpersonal relationships. Therapy can often help a client clarify for themselves which of their fears are realistic, meriting real attention, and which fears might be exaggerated and unnecessarily holding them back. Often, clients find that working with a trained therapist who understands their experience allows them to discover solutions to problems that had previously seemed insurmountable.

Therapy When Being Trans or Non-Binary Isn’t The Focus

Some trans and gender-expansive people come to therapy to deal with a problem completely unrelated to gender. For example, a trans or non-binary person may come to therapy because their parent just died and the client is awash in grief. This person may need help moving through the pain of their loss. A different trans or non-binary client may come to therapy at the end of romantic relationship. This client may be heartbroken and disoriented, needing help understanding what went wrong in the relationship. In therapy this client may learn something important that helps them in their next romantic relationship. And still another trans or non-binary client may come to therapy because they are plagued by dark episodes in which the world seems overwhelming and heavy. This client may need help with making meaning of the mysterious darkness that overtakes them. They may also need practical strategies for getting un-depressed.

In these cases, gender isn’t the concern. Life happens to everyone, and it can be overwhelming for anyone. In such instances, a therapist who is overly focused on the client’s gender would be badly missing the mark. A trans, non-binary or gender expansive client may decide to enter therapy with a trans or queer therapist because they anticipate that such a therapist won’t be distracted by gender when there is something more pressing that the client needs to discuss.

If you are ready to get started in therapy, and you think we could be a good match, I encourage you to contact me. I’ll be glad to hear from you.

You can schedule a time to talk, call 415-881-8260 or email me.